The Family

The Family
Aaron, Amanda, and Ace

Monday, February 7, 2011

Amazing day!

Today I had an OBGYN appointment with my amazing doctor- Dr. Khan. He delivered Moriah. He was so kind and optimistic about the hopes of another baby it was contagious. He asked if we were trying again, I told him yes and this big smile beamed across his face. "Good, you deserve a baby and we have a game plan for you!" At 14 weeks I will receive a ultrasound every 10-14 days- to check the baby and my cervix. If anything about the cervix changes I will be getting a stitch. At the 14 week mark I will be also receiving progesterone shots as often as they can give them to me whether the cervix changes or not- that is a for sure plan. The appointment he has checked me and all is a go! Aaron had mentioned trying again before I did. The pregnancy became real for him the moment he held her. Often times thats when dad's become dad's. Mom become moms when their pee stick comes back positive lol. Its often hard for them when the baby isn't growing, moving, and kicking in them to feel the connection or bonding. However- looking into Aaron's eyes as he held his little girl, I knew then he was a different man from that point on, she changed him for the better. As soon as I had gotten through a week without bawling at the mention of her name, he held my hand and said "We should try again, when you can. We need to keep the faith and try before my deployment in hopes of getting our baby so when I get back you will be ending your pregnancy." It was a hard thought for me, but in my heart I knew he was right. The longer we sit with fear- the easier it will be to stay completely in that fear. We know the worries and fear and massive prayers that will be included in our next pregnancy but I now have a peace about trying again. I am also at peace with the fact we may not conceive before Aaron deploys, and that is ok. :) We will try at the end of the year when he returns.
On the way home form the appointment today, the March of Dimes gal called me and it was an amazing conversation. She had experienced loss too as well. A beautiful baby came too soon for her at 22 weeks. I am excited to meet her at the Kick Off Breakfast for March Of Dimes Feb 24th, and possibly share my story with the March of Dimes walkers on the walk day. I have asked to share my story if they needed it and its a good possibility. All that I can do to help, I will do! God has put an amazing peace in my heart and soul and I believe the best is yet to come for our family!

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Moriahs FULL story~

Nov 30th, 2010

 Last night Amanda's cervix decided it couldn't hold Moriah anymore!  Her membranes prolapsed, but we were able to get them semi back in and get Amanda to the hospital.  Right now we are trying to keep Moriah in as long as possible!  But we know how wonderful the power of prayer is and we need as many as we can get.  We are at a waiting game to see what will happen next.  Amanda remains in the hospital and is trying everything she can to keep Moriah in!  Please pray!!!

Doctor came in about an hour ago and talked to us!  Amanda will be in the hospital head down for the next 2-3 or more weeks.  The next 3 days are very critical for us!  We are hoping and praying that the uterus calms down and the membranes continue to go back in.  Amanda does have some bleeding, but that is due to the trauma to the cervix from last night.  Moriah weighs 300 grams right now and needs to be 400 grams to be a viable baby.  If we get to 500 + grams we are GOLDEN!!!!  Moriah is doing great. She is kicking and moving around with a heart rate of 162.  Which is GREAT!!! 

Amanda is on meds to stop contractions and is only having a few right now.  Nothing like last night!  They usually happen once Amanda eats and Moriah is getting her food. :) Please pray that Amanda can with stand being on complete bedrest (not even allowed to get up and pee) for the next 3 weeks to get us to where we need to be to have a whole new outlook and ballgame to play.  So, we are on bedrest for 2-3 weeks with Amanda's head down.  After 2-3 weeks we will re-assess and maybe stitch the cervix closed at that point.  It is to high risk to do now!

Continue to pray and we will continue to keep you updated on our progress!  God Bless!!!!

Dec 1 , 2010

Well today started off GREAT!!  No contractions and Amanda was in great spirits.  At about 12:30 Amanda started getting increasing pain on her right side and contractions started again.  They continue to give her meds to stop the contractions around the clock since she has been in the hospital.  At first they thought maybe she might be having an appendix problem.  They did some labs and found out that there is no infection anywhere in her body.  So we kind of ruled out an appendix problem.  After talking to the doctor we think it might be gas.  They have put Amanda on gas X to see if it helps.  At 7:00pm tonight the contractions had stopped and Moriah is still inside kicking and heartbeating at 155.  We are 20 weeks and 4 days by our calculations, but by the last sono (done on 11/22/2010) Moriah is measuring 21 wks already.  Which is great news! Please continue to pray for us as we go through this rough time.  Pray that we can keep the positive thinking up and the frustration down!

Dec 3, 2010 Moriah's Birth

Today started off really well with no contractions and small bleeding. I was able to use the restroom alot and my tummy began to feel better. Round 1 pm I began to get a headache that became o unbearable I had to have anti-nausea for I felt like vomiting. The medicine given hardly touched it. Mid afternoon I and my nurses noticed a much increase in my bleeding to a point of massive concern. Despite this I had made so much progress they moved me from Labor and Delivery to a more permenant more comfy home room. But after the move and transfer to the new bed, an hour later I had horrible contractions and pressure below. I knew something was wrong, was it all the restroom trips to the bedpan or the slight adjustment to the new bed? Doctor rushed in with the ultrasound machine to find it was neither any of those things but a slow leak of amniotic fluid as the us showed babys sac almost empty and her legs and feet in my birth canal already causing my labor. Around 8 pm I had to have the nurse call the doctor in and after two doses (my max) of staydol and antinauseait still wasnt touching my pain. I was sure that it was it, and it was. Everyone around me didnt want to believe me and had so much hope and I felt so bad as I knew what my body was telling me and I had accepted that baby had moved down and it felt like pushing. They rolled me back to Labor and Delivery and there I began the labor process, Aaron was a lot of help but I could see the fear inside. Tosha arrived helping me breathe as JAN was when my classes were I was clueless. Boy oh boy, it stunk. I began after about 40 minutes of strong labor asking for the epidural kinda feel dumb as baby was so small but I was so sad about everything I wanted to be comfortable as possible too. The guy got the tube in but not the drugs as Moriah came out right before hand, I was able to make through before the epi. I was in shock, she was here- long before ready. All the pushing and pain, and now she was here. I was scared, I looked at Aaron and saw the happiness yet the words "shes so small" then sadness and tears. I wanted to see her right away. She was so amazingly beautiful and so stinking tiny. I was so happy but was told by NICU there was nothing and I knew that before tellling me, she was the size of my hand. She was alive and pink, moving and kicking smaking her mouth in my arms for over 40 mintues. I cried, was in awe of her, and loved her more then life. She began to grow colder and colder then ceased to move. So they took her to the morge where tomorrow we find a local funeral home for we have decided to cremate her as VA is not our home and we had a vacation plain back to WA Dec 29 that we now find more then necessary to keep now. We will buy a pretty llittle urn for her and her small ashes im assuming to sprinkle them in Daddy's own made waterfall in the backyard in Tumwater, WA where our Engagement Photos were taken. The rest to be kept at home in her own room. 

RIP Moriah Pearl Poplin Daddy and I love and miss you already. I will always remember kissing you goodbye. XOXO

I will neverforget the priveledge I received to watch that beautful life enter this world and be there to watch her join my Jesus- many parents never recieve that joy and pain

Moriah Pearl Poplin
Born: 12/3/10 at 855pm  Passed on: 12/3/10 at 9:37  21 weeks old to the day
PSALMS 34:19